Yakub.

Yakub came back from KL lastweek. for those who aren't familiar with him, he was one of my closest friend back in PDS. ahh, memories. he's the absolute greatest =).

we met up tonight. just me, yakub and muiz. it was fun.
i've missed you guys.

sitting there with them just talking about the things that's happened, what has happened to who and all that made me realise that our youth, our crazy teenage years are long gone. we don't talk about the silly little things anymore. we now talk about things like marriage, careers, life growing up and where we see ourselves so many years down the road. how i long for the days where when you wake up every morning thinking "i'm going to have so much fun with my friends today!". i miss my old friends. they were and still are the best.

we were talking about this thing over dinner and Yakub asks me "so, who do you hang out with now?" and then i thought for a bit and i answered "mostly muj" and then i said "i don't know ah. i mean, i do have friends but honestly speaking i still prefer being with the guys back in PDS." and honestly, it's true. i do love being with the friends i have now but it's like, i've known the ones in PDS for so long and we have created sooo many memories and it's just awesome.

i've realised that i'm getting too tired to make new friends. too tired as in "hi, whats your name? thats nice. dari sekulah mana? siuk tah?" and it goes on and on AND ON AND ON! it's fun and all but it's kind of..hard to like..watch people come in to your life and leave after you've made the effort the say or do something.

i'm greatful that i still have some friends in my life that i know i can keep. i really do miss you guys. and you do not know how much i appreciate you being around.

when i think about it a little harder, the fact that i don't get too intimate with people is because i have intimacy issues. and it goes WAAAAYYY back. entah ah..life's nothing but a challenge.

i will prevail. MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA!!!!

siti